mastermind

Just do it!

I needed a hug.

My daughters had been at my mom’s house for the week because they didn’t have school, and I hadn’t planned a vacation for us.

Though physical touch is not my top love language, it is high on the list. Deprived of the daily hugs and affection, and nightly cuddles at 3am with my littles, by Friday I was feeling rather empty.

Little did I know my tank was going to be so full after a weekend of masterminding.

Let me back up…

Two years ago I showed up at a Bschool mastermind feeling completely out of place. Why did I think I belonged there with people doing greater things than me?

Sure, I had a burning DESIRE to change my life in XYZ fashion; sure, I had the knowledge of the steps I needed to take; sure, I had a dream in my heart. But me? It seemed out of character.

You can read more about it here, but I can tell you that I walked away from that weekend with clarity and new friends, including a friend in Sean Croxton, whom I had followed since 2015 or so.

Now 2 years later, I couldn’t be happier that I said yes and stepped out of my comfort zone in 2017.

This past Labor Day weekend I was lucky enough to assist Sean at yet another epic mastermind with his BSchool and Money Mind Academy students (I’m part of both groups)..

After being surrounded by beautiful souls full of passion, burgeoning goals, and even greater visions for not only their own lives but the lives of many, is such a privilege.

To be privy to the early entrepreneurial days - the untangling of kinks, the clarification of ideas, and the typical wrestling of internal voices - is nothing but beautiful.

I can honestly say that coming together in one room for two days has changed all of our lives for the better. Not to mention, the Saturday evening party is the best!

I tell you all of this because perhaps you’re wrestling with loneliness or fear, doubt or a general feeling of being stuck.

While an event like I described above is amazing, you don’t need to travel far or find 50 like-minded people. Simply look to your inner circle and create your own mastermind.

Jim Rohn says we’re the average of the five people we spend the most time with. Who could you spend more time with to encourage you, nudge you in the right direction, and hold you accountable to your dreams?

Find those people and meet regularly to celebrate your wins, set goals, ask for support, and above all help each other live success-filled and happy lives. (Learn more with this book: The Power of the Mastermind by Mitch Horowitz)

In reflection, it’s also interesting and rewarding to review the steps and journey I’ve taken the last two years. During my first mastermind in 2017, I was pursuing health coaching. My action items from the event was to slow down and create the space to enjoy the process of creating my nutrition ebook and website.

I’m not good at slowing down. I’m either all in or completely all out. Ha!

But I tried, and in the following 7 months I designed my website and wrote and published my Bowl to Belly ebook, which is a paleo cookbook paying homage to my heritage and travels.

Now 2 years later, with some prompting (thanks Sean!) and introspection, I’m pivoting and will be launching my podcast this next week! Woot!

But guess what, while related to health and wellness in some sense, it’s not nutrition focused. In the subsequent year after writing Bowl to Belly, I realized I loved cooking and my kids WAY more than I loved coaching.

My podcast, PG-ish, is your parental guidance to help you grow yourself as a parent and raise healthy, happy, successful humans. On Pg-ish I’ve gathered - in manageable bites - wisdom from today’s teachers, psychologists, doctors, authors, and parents that can help transform your parental experience from overwhelm and frustration to growth and success. Not only for your children but for yourself.

If parenting had a guidebook, this would be it.

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In short, my podcast is my dedication to becoming the best mom I can be. For me, parenting is the hardest, yet most important job there is. Let’s be honest, I don’t think I’m alone in this thought or in the desire to figure out how to be good at it and help your kids have a rewarding, less traumatic childhood.

I hope you’ll join me on this new journey! We launch this week - I’ll post the link when we go live!

All in all, if you’re in the midst of chasing your dreams, give yourself grace. Keep going, but know it takes time and most likely several pivots that can be riddled with fear and doubt and impostor syndrome. Keep going, knowing you’re in the right boat, in a sea of others feeling all of the same feels!

“People Overestimate What They Can Do in a Day, and Underestimate What They Can Do in a Lifetime” -Bill gates, Tony Robins, and lots of other really successful people!

Just do it!

It's all grace.

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It's easy to blame others.

My computer. My kids. My boss. The other driver. BART delays.

Yet most of the time it's me. Ok, lately it's been been my lame, "vintage" computer that needs some updating. But even that falls back in my lap. I'm the common denominator.

Since early spring, I've been saying I lost my groove after Christmas - 2016. Yet it's still missing, nine months later. While some mighty fine things have come to fruition, I'm still in shock it's already September. Now the pressure is on.

Or is it?

I guess you could say since completing my Precision Nutrition Level 1 Certification in December, I've gone into double-time work mode. Working from 8-5, single parenting, commuting close to 2 hours, cleaning, cooking, working my side gigs at night and on the train. It seemed feasible, until I didn't want to do it anymore. The passion faded.  

I'm far from perfect and recognize my flaws, yet when I've lost myself in the muck and mire of being an adult, clocking in and out of the daily grind, and having minimal fun, I'm not a great coach. When my own health has become a weak bystander, how can I coach others on their healthy habits? When I'm tired and impatient, how can I be the best mom I desire to be? 

No doubt it's a catch-22. I'm working hard to achieve the outcome of defining my own schedule, being my own boss, and ultimately being more available for my daughters. But the process I've created is not sustainable. No one is winning.

 Jim Rohn says we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with. Hmmmm, okay. Well, I spend 8 hours surrounded by engineers, that I don't necessarily engage with. I live with two irrational, selfish creatures who use incessant tactics to gain my attention. Time with my friends is brief as life beckons and pulls in other directions. So who is shaping my environment, for better or worse?

That being said, I was blessed to spend Labor Day weekend with some really cool people at a mastermind event. For two days I surrounded myself with wicked smart entrepreneurs, and let me tell you, it was not only inspiring but there were definitely game-changing sparks! 

If you know Sean Croxton, you know he dropped some truth bombs about the power of our mind, fear, setting intentions and taking action. If you need daily motivation check out his Quote of the Day show. I promise it will set the tone to have a kick-ass day. 

Dave of PaleoHacks, whipped us into shape when it comes to website basics and blogging.

Ella, from OnairwithElla, talked about Impostor Syndrome, how to crush fear, and how to take action to daily choose and create a life that energizes us. 

Jake Ducey, whom I had first heard on the Sessions, was every bit as hippy as I expected him to be, and it was awesome. Reiterating Ella's discussion, he focused on the PROCESS, the daily steps we need to take in the process to create the outcome we want, without getting hung up on the outcome. Developing a practice of process will get us there.

Getting back to GRACE.

Christine Hassler, who I also first heard on the Sessions, capped our event with some incredible coaching. My time with her, as well as witnessing shifts in others, allowed me to recognize it's ok to take a step back. I had been going, going, going, trying to prove I could do it all. All for what?

People effing love to tell me how amazing I am for doing it all as a single mom. Lead in questions, always start with, "I don't know how you do it, but it seems to be working!"

Actually no, it's not working. It's lonely. It's hard. It's sad a lot of the time. I'm constantly moving money around to pay bills. I don't get as much sleep as I'd like to be a nice person. There may or may not be a pile of laundry on my couch or still in the dryer at all times (is there a service for someone to fold my clothes?). I'm not able to do a lot of things. It's not ideal. I can't really say it's working, but I'm grateful we're functioning and I can provide a roof over my head, and yummy food to eat (most of the time). 

Not that I needed permission, but Christine articulated it for me. It's ok. Perhaps you're burned out and you need to take a step back. Reevaluate this is your time - that you can invest in the process, which is time consuming, all consuming, and sometimes hard. It's ok to wait, there is nothing to prove RIGHT NOW. Don't miss out on the NOW by forcing something else.

And like that, the pressure was off.

I'm not giving up, in fact, more than ever, I'm more excited to work with clients. However, the pressure was released.  

That's good stuff right there! 

As my wonderful friend can attest, as I was texting her up until I walked into the conference room, I was nervous to attend the event. Was it going to be worth it? Did I even belong there? What the hell am I doing? 

In every sense it was worth it. I highly recommend bschool and a mastermind event with Sean and his pals. If for nothing else, to enjoy the bootchcraft and interesting conversations that come after your hard days work absorbing new knowledge. 

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So what are you afraid of doing or not doing? What's holding you back of sharing the unique gifts you've been entrusted with? Are you putting too much pressure on yourself? Who is your tribe of 5? I want to know!